In the World, But Not of the World—Does That Justify Fornication?
One day, I came across a post on Facebook that made me pause. At first, I felt anger—anger at how people twist Yah’s Word to justify sin, particularly fornication. Many claim, “We are in the world, but not of the world” as an excuse for lawlessness, including sexual immorality.
But does Yah’s Word truly support this idea? Does being in the world but not of it mean we can live however we want, disregarding His commands? And what does marriage really mean in Yah’s eyes?
But does Yah’s Word truly support this idea? Does being in the world but not of it mean we can live however we want, disregarding His commands? And what does marriage really mean in Yah’s eyes?
To answer this, we must ask: What constitutes a biblical marriage?
Defining Marriage in Yah’s Eyes
Before diving into the debate, let’s define fornication:
Fornication is sexual intercourse between partners who are not married to each other.
But then comes the question:
- Is marriage defined only by a government certificate?
- Does a couple need a formal ceremony with covenant vows?
- Or is sexual intercourse alone enough to constitute marriage?
1. The Role of Government in Marriage
Some argue that marriage is valid only if recognized by the government. But is that true?Romans 13:1-4 tells us:
"Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of יהוה: the powers that be are ordained of יהוה..."
1 Peter 2:17 reinforces this:
"Respect all, love the brotherhood, fear Elohim, and respect the sovereign (authorities)."
"Respect all, love the brotherhood, fear Elohim, and respect the sovereign (authorities)."
Yah establishes authorities, and as long as their laws do not contradict His commands, we are to follow them. In many places, a marriage license is required for a union to be legally recognized. Rejecting that just for the sake of rebellion is dangerous because it ignores Yah’s role in placing governing authorities.
That said, governments did not always exist, yet marriage did. Adam and Hawwah (Eve) were joined before Yah without a legal document. So does that mean we don’t need one today?
2. The Importance of the Father’s Role
Marriage is more than just paperwork—it is a transfer of headship.Numbers 30:3-5 explains that a young woman’s father has authority over her vows while she is unmarried. If she marries, that authority transfers to her husband.
"If a woman vows a vow to יהוה, and binds herself by some agreement while in her father’s house in her youth, and her father hears her vow and has kept silent, then all her vows shall stand..." (Numbers 30:3-5)
This is why even today, many wedding ceremonies include the phrase “Who gives this bride away?”—a remnant of Yah’s design, even though most do not understand its true significance.
A woman is to be covered—first by her father, then by her husband. A true biblical marriage involves this transfer of covering. A man cannot simply take a woman without this structure.
3. Why Sexual Intercourse Alone Does NOT Constitute Marriage
There are some who claim that as long as a couple has sexual relations, they are married in Yah’s eyes. But is this true?If so, then the average person in today’s society has multiple spouses, since many have had relations with multiple partners before committing to a covenant. That is not Yah’s design!
We see clear biblical distinctions between wives and concubines:
"And Rehoboam loved Maacah the granddaughter of Absalom more than all his wives and his concubines. For he had taken eighteen wives and sixty concubines." (2 Chronicles 11:21)
Had sexual intercourse alone been enough to create a marriage, concubines would be called wives—but they are not. This distinction shows that sex alone does not create a covenant.
1 Corinthians 7:2 further clarifies:
"But because of whoring, let each one have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband."
If sex automatically made a couple married, there would be no distinction between fornication and marriage. But there is!
4. Biblical Examples of Proper Marriage
Some point to Genesis 24 and the marriage of Yitshaq (Isaac) and Rebekah as proof that sexual intercourse alone is enough. However, when we examine the full passage, we see:- Abraham sent a servant to arrange the marriage. (Genesis 24:1-10)
- The servant sought Yah’s confirmation through prayer. (Genesis 24:12-14)
- Rebekah’s family acknowledged Yah’s hand in the arrangement. (Genesis 24:32-51)
- A dowry was given. (Genesis 24:52-59)
- Rebekah willingly consented to the marriage. (Genesis 24:58)
This was a structured, intentional process, not simply an act of passion.
5. What Constitutes Marriage in Yah’s Eyes?
So, what is required for a biblical marriage?- Covenantal Commitment—Vows exchanged between man and woman
- Acknowledgment from Headship—Father’s blessing or witness
- A Formal Process—Whether a legal document or a biblically structured agreement
- Sexual Consummation—To complete the one flesh principle
Some couples live in places where a marriage license is not required, yet they still establish a formal covenant that is publicly recognized.
For example, I know a couple who do not have a government marriage certificate. However, their union was publicly acknowledged, included the father’s blessing, and was marked by the wife legally changing her last name to her husband's.
This was their way of making a public declaration of covenant, aligning with biblical principles even without government documentation.
Yah knows the difference between a true marriage covenant and an attempt to justify sexual immorality.
"That if our heart condemns us, Elohim is greater than our heart, and knows all." (1 John 3:20)
The Hidden Truth in the Hebrew Language
Hebrew is an incredible language, often revealing deeper meaning within the words themselves.
The words for man (Ish) and woman (Isha) share two common letters—forming the name Yah (יה).
The remaining letters spell Fire (אש)—symbolizing destruction.
When Yah is in a marriage, it is blessed. When He is removed, all that remains is fire.
Final Thought
Marriage is not a government contract or just a physical relationship—it is a covenant before Yah. Let us honor it the way He intended.
May your marriages be blessed!
Marriage is not a government contract or just a physical relationship—it is a covenant before Yah. Let us honor it the way He intended.
May your marriages be blessed!